much is written about the luxury which grandparents have in their ability to spoil their grandchildren. Ironically, that tradition has been compounded in contemporary society because of our high divorce rate, which, arguably, has reached epidemic proportions. One of the by-products of America's high rate of fractured families is the fact that now, instead of having two sets of grandparents to shower gifts upon their progeny, children sometimes find that they have four sets of grandparents readily opening their wallets for birthday and holiday giving.
Why, we ask ourselves, does every child under the age of 13 need to have his/her very own room, TV, cell phone, X-Box, tablet, laptop, etc., etc., etc.?! How did it come to pass that it is no longer unusual for youngsters to request and to expect a holiday gift list which surpasses 1K+ - Yes, you heard me! I said, "More than $1,000!" To attest to the fact that this phenomenon is not an anomaly, stop and ask yourself how many families with young children within your family/friends circle fit this description. But more, how often and how deeply have you yourself been caught up in this frenzy to give your grandchildren the latest gizmo of the year, regardless of the cost, while privately shaking your head in dismay and disapproval of what you have been an accomplice to?
This past holiday I reached the brink of despair when one of my friends' grandchildren casually stated, "Christmas is all about money." Neither he nor his brothers have any historical or spiritual perspective on the meaning and purpose of Christmas. It's all about making sure that they receive everything on their list, which I have noticed has become increasingly more lavish each year. The teenager wanted and expected not one, not two, but three different guitars - each one costing a few hundred dollars. After all, he 'needs' an electric, a bass, and an acoustic guitar.
Sadly, and through no fault of his own, his parents have neglected to instill any awareness or appreciation for the meaning of Christmas; nor have they let slip the fact that they are both struggling financially, and will assume unnecessary added debt to satisfy his request. Meanwhile, his little brother only wants a tablet, his own 32" TV, the latest X-Box, and numerous video games to entertain himself.
How can we, the Boomer generation who became the poster children for rampant consumerism, reverse this 'give me' culture with which we are unfortunately impregnating our grandchildren? How do we stop buying in to the annual 'buy everything' frenzy which seems to begin earlier each year and to accelerate in dollars? Do we even realize and admit that such consumerism is toxic, that it teaches our children false, superficial values, that it negates and obscures the meaning of gifting, that it fosters bad habits within the younger generation and raises artificial expectations?
Oh, yes we can! We can and should and, in fact are finding and giving sustainable gifts that keep on giving, treasures that will yield a substantive, long-range return on our investment for and in our grandchildren. Such intangible 'pebble causing ripples in the water' gifts comprise the stuff of which future family traditions and values are made of.
In my next article, we'll look at several fantastic, creative, meaningful, long-lasting gifts you can give your grandchildren - non-traditional stuff that you won't find at the mall, or on Amazon.com. Better still these items of substance won't end up in the trash bin, in the Good Will store, or be relegated to the dead-end destiny of attic, basement, garage or shed.
Dr. Marie Langworthy is a retired educator/administrator and current author/editor. Through her online
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